You might be a New Dad if…

I would like an adult onesie please

With just under 2 weeks before the baby arrives, I’ve often had thoughts run through my head that, I’m sure, only cross the mind of first-time fathers. I felt obligated to create a list and include some of them here. Some of these things I’ve actually wondered, others I haven’t actually worried about but I’m sure there’s some first time father that has. 

– How slow is too slow to drive home from the hospital for the very first time?

– Can I open up the magical land of Narnia if I push the baby’s soft spot?

– I’ve pulled all-nighters before, this “no sleep” thing will be a breeze.

– Why don’t they make onesies for adults? They look extremely comfortable and convenient.

– Can’t we just rinse off that diaper and reuse it? It’s not that dirty.

– Why did I ever stop letting people feed me and change me and bathe me? Overachiever

– What does breast milk taste like?

– When can I stop counting in months?

– Why does every single thing in my house suddenly seem so dangerous?

– How soon before I can start steering my son’s rooting interests toward my favorite teams?

This entry was posted in Man Thoughts, Parenting and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to You might be a New Dad if…

  1. My first good laugh of the day! Thanks Bro!

    Mark L.

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